Monday, July 13, 2015

My Trust


This popped up on my feed on Facebook today. Two years ago, I hadn't even published yet. The process begun. I published August 24, 2013.

A final post for today. I found out Friday why my sinus headaches had felt different this winter. They weren't sinus headaches but infected teeth. Cavities in wisdom teeth and some dangerously close to my root canal. I didn't really feel sick, even after seeing the huge gray and white jaw x-rays on the flat screen TV and quoted the price to have some procedures done. Not until the dental hygienist patted me on the back as I stood at the desk writing a check and stated, "You'll feel better Monday morning after starting the antibiotics. You still need to get this done, though."
This morning, I wanted to sleep. My bed is comfortable, the room dark. I don't see the wonderful sunshine and in my dreams I'm somewhere with lots of people swimming in a beautiful indoor pool. My head feels full with a dull pressure. I want it only to go away. I'm cold because I left the air conditioner on. I open windows to let in the morning air.
I'm down. I want to call off and hide. The proclaimed inspectors should be here this week. We have only been waiting for over a month of tension. Change in leadership with no knowledge of the new churns my head. Work as unto the Lord pops up in my fears. Work. The Lord has a purpose, but I want to hide.
David encouraged me in my writing, too, over the weekend. I got my new business cards. He seemed more excited than I was. He is helping me plan with my upcoming book signings.
So yes, today, I woke discouraged. I know though I will not go to sleep that way. As the theme of my work in progress develops, God is there in the future, too. He not only knows, He lives there as well. Heady stuff to wrap my mind around, but I'm feeling it more and more. And I only need to fix my eyes upon Jesus. Look up, oh my soul. Don't be discouraged. Put your trust in God.
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